Lakhdeep

"Do you speak English?", "Is this your car?" ,"Don't you have trunks in Canada?" and the showstopper was "Extra turbans in the trunk"? The humiliation and self-doubt was unreal. This surreal experience became all too familiar to me when crossing three times a week. I became hardened and often angry before crossing. No matter what I did, nothing changed. I never once had an experience where I pulled up, showed my identification, submitted my student pass and proceeded to class. This experience seemed reserved for my fellow white Canadian classmates only.

With the help of good professors and great friends, convocation morning arrived. My entire family was ready to see me walk across the stage and claim the first master's degree in the Dhaliwal family. I was so proud that day; proud to be Canadian, proud to tie my turban, proud of my English and Sikh roots. However, this ended abruptly as we pulled up to the familiar border crossing that morning and were detained for a "random" screening process. We were kept at the border for 6 hours. We were fingerprinted and even retina scanned. We were corralled into a room full of "random" screening candidates that all had a similar or darker skin tones than ours I remember feeling like I just wanted to go home and go to bed. 

"Crossing is a privilege and not a right, you are not being extended this privilege today", was the official statement before we were all turned away and the reality of missing convocation set in. This was the last time I showed up to a border crossing into the United States. More than 10 years have past and I still cannot bring myself to even show up to a border. I make up all manner of excuses not to cross. If I have it my way, I may never cross again.

Today, as a college professor, I never second guess a late arriving student. Border or no border, we all have experiences to cross on our journey in life.

Lakhdeep Singh Dhaliwal